Final thoughts on Rejection part 3

What brought all of this discussion on?  Ouch…this hurts!  Well, two weeks ago tomorrow I met this guy.  Said guy and I hit it off!  He was so easy to talk to and we could have talked for hours!  Said guy came over and hung out on a Friday night.  We kept talking into the wee hours.  Said guy came over again on the following Monday.  We talked again until the wee hours.  I was enjoying where this was going.  It was good!    BUT on Wednesday we texted back and forth most of the day.  First off I am not a HUGE fan of texting a whole lot because tone and emotion get lost and misinterpreted in texting.  He found my insecurity.  I allowed him to push me to talk about my insecurity.  But by opening up about my insecurity I kept asking if “I” was ok?  I was looking for that rejection.  Since he found my insecurity I wanted to be affirmed by seeing him, by getting a hug.  He had told me the day before that he was going to be busy for the next few weeks because of an assistant manager being fired.  But I continued to push and asked 4 times if I could see him!  I ruined something that could have been.  That I will now not know what could have been.  I was told I was too pushy and needy.  I will agree with the pushy part.  I also learned that by being in an unhealthy relationship for 11.5 years where I constantly sought out the rejection and the negativity that I have to reprogram my mind to know that not every guy is the same.  That being talked down to is not “normal”.  So, the next time something good is placed in my lap I am going to enjoy it rather than seek out the rejection!

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